Confidence

When I started running I was quite concerned about how I expected other people would look at me and what they would think. I am normally quite self conscious, so it’s not a huge surprise I’d feel like this.

What is surprising is how much I don’t care now, and how much of a different person I feel when I am running. It never occurs to me to be self conscious. If I’m walking past someone and they smile and say hello, I still find that surprising and awkward, as strange as it sounds, I feel incapable of making any form of convincing or genuine response, which almost certainly makes me incapable of delivering one, and makes the whole thing an awkward affair for all involved. Yet if I’m running past someone and they smile and say hello, I smile and say hello right back. THERE. DONE.

It doesn’t phase me in the slightest that when I go out running for 7 miles that I’m going to be putting myself on display for hundreds (thousands?) of people, many of whom, let’s face it, are going to look at me twice, feeling anything from amusement to jealousy to admiration.

I think the difference between running and real life is that while I’m running, not just do I feel awesome, I feel that I am awesome. There is a reason that exercise is addictive…

Now if only I could work out how to apply this to the rest of my life…

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