That p word

It’s a little ironic that the Daily Mail of all people wants online porn blocked. This is the very same website that shows virtually endless celebrity porn down its right hand side, which it uses to make articles with such insightful messages as “ooh, isn’t she fat?”, “ooh, isn’t she thin?”, “ooh, look at her bottom” and “ooh, look at her chest”.

Here’s the blurb for one such ‘story’:

“No sudden movements! Kourtney Kardashian shows her body confidence in a daring low cut swimsuit. She knows how to show off her assets”

Riiight.

This is such a horrible story

We have three completely different things all under one announcement:

1. Online porn is being blocked, ‘blocked’, until you ask your ISP to unblock it. Which is pretty stupid, and I’m pretty sure we’ve already seen this proposal recently from a conservative MP (a woman whose name I do not recall) and it got thrown out before it gathered much traction because it had all the signs of being the result of someone with too much influence and too little grip on reality trying to inflict their world view on the rest of the country, which people with slightly more awareness regarded as bad form and not conductive to election prospects. I don’t know how this is going to work on any level. Is Reddit going to be blocked? Is imgur? Flickr?

2. ‘Simulated rape’ porn is being blocked. I don’t know what this means and I doubt anyone else does. Does someone being tied up sufficiently imply simulated lack of consent that it can be considered simulated rape? I don’t see how this benefits anyone. The Fast And The Furious 6 should be banned for any of a long list of reasons, but because it depicts simulated reckless driving is not one of them. Nor should productions of Hamlet be immediately suspended because they depict simulated murder. Game of Thrones, incest? THE BIBLE?!

3. Child porn is being blocked. Ever since the web’s inception, people have been sitting around thinking “what shall we do about the child porn?”. We are thankful to glorious leader Dave for coming up with this exceptional plan of action after almost 10 minutes of intense thought. Next up: Glorious leader Dave applies a similar process to solve spam and hacking. Why stop there? Drink driving’s a problem – let’s ban it! I’m ahead of you here, Dave, keep up.

It’s disgusting he’s shoe-horned legal normal pornography together with child porn, as if they are somehow the same.

So is this about porn, or is it about legally solidifying the ridiculous amount of control they already have in place thanks to GCHQ’s extensive monitoring of every single piece of data that passes through the UK’s hardware?

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